Friday, July 22, 2016
Practicing Awareness of Microaggressions
I think that it's important to mention that microaggression occur in many relationships we have within our lives. One aggression that I was on the receiving end occurred when another mother (and a long-time friend of mine) made a comment regarding her son's soccer team and then made a subsequent comment about the league that my son plays in. Her comment conveyed a message, that because she lives outside the city of Philadelphia, Pa (and I live in more rural area of state), that her son was in a better and more competitive league. She did not know that we are all a part of a similar league and shared the same experience. (Which I was quick and a little too defensively inform her of). It took me awhile to shake the statements she made because it brought up other statements she has made in the past which were also unintentionally hurtful and were made in a comparative way regarding the areas in which we live. So when Dr. Sue, made the comment this week during the video about how cumulative microaggressions could be, I definitely could relate to that statement.
Learning more about microaggressions and the different contexts in which they occur has made me more observant during the conversations that I am a part of, as well as, the conversations which are occurring around me. It has also made me think about the stereotypes and biases I have, and has made me much from sensitive to them. Especially, when engaged in dialogues with my own children.
Laureate Education (Producer). (2011). Microaggressions in everyday life [Video file]. Retrieved from https://class.waldenu.edu
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Learning about microaggressions has also made me take a good look at myself and interactions I have had. I know I need to be more aware of what I say to others, I like to be funny and sarcastic which can easily lead to microaggressions without realizing it. I have also like you thought about things I may say in front of my children not intending to teach microaggression of course, but now I wonder. We recently visited family and on the way home my husband and I did discuss things that were different about how we raised our children than other family member with our children in the car. Classic parent move, thinking the kids aren't listening. I wonder how many time we have modeled microaggression toward family and friends for our children. This realization was hard and I'm not proud of it, but I do intended to be much more aware of my words and actions.
ReplyDeleteMegan,
ReplyDeleteYou made a great point by discussing microaggresssions that are even more common; the ones we encounter in our everyday, more intimate relationships. People that we know don’t mean to be hurtful, but still are. It is my belief that in those cases, it is even more important that we speak up and let them know that are offended. When we don’t, we face the possibilities of becoming too defensive, as you mention, and being more offensive than we intend. When we get to that point, we pass up the opportunity to educate the offender. I can be very passive at times, so there have been a few occasions, where I have been on the receiving end of microagression and decided not to speak up until, I had had enough at that point I was ready to explode. I now understand that when someone is offensive to me, even when they don’t mean it. It is just as important to let them know and educate them on the matter.
Hi Megan,
ReplyDeleteSorry to hear about your experience with microaggression but its good that you realized it quickly and acted upon it. I will be more interested to learn now how to handle any type of microaggressions.
Megan,
ReplyDeleteYou made a very valid statement that microagressions are big in relationships that we have today. I have noticed it a lot in between friends and couples and families as well. I feel like a lot of the times they are just really comfortable with the person and don't think that what they say will have an affect as much or they may be joking and not mean any harm. Regardless it can be offensive and hurtful even when you are just joking. I have witnessed it and also been a victim to it as well.